Numb,

Needless to say, so far 2020 has been quite the shit show. We all know what happened because we were all at the same party. Some of us cried our way through it, some of us held our families tightly, some of us drank a whole lot, some of us got fit, some of us got fat, all of us united. We spoke of ending wars, dolphins in Venice, love as the only way and as we faced with our imminent demise we bowed our heads to our Gods and prayed for salvation. 

As our doors slowly open, here we are, not at the end of it, not even at the beginning of it, but somewhere floating up above it as though it were a nightmare we have finally woken up from. Somehow it's already like it never happened. Memory loss on a mass scale. Like the brain is hardwired to trick itself into survival. Once again uprising against injustice, the blame game, whose fault is it. Find them for they shall be punished for our suffering. I suffered more, no I did, no they did, no he did, no she did. It's their fault, no his fault, no her fault. And finally, the powers that be have us distracted enough to get on with the job. Catapult us into a new era. A transfer of power is all it is. Religion to Science, White to Black, Male to Female, Oil to Green, American to Chinese, Human to Technology. Out with the old and in with new. All the while numbed by fear, we have all too hastily forgotten that we could have made it work. We could have all had a piece of the pie. We could have been the same. We could have stayed united. 

Before this, I had never allowed myself to believe that humans are good. I had never witnessed just how easy it could be. Humanity in mass mourning. Broken, receptive and truthful. Revealed. Finally. I'm struggling with this change of heart. I thought maybe we'd all get to play with each other. Instead, the masks are back on and the show has commenced right where it left off. Our egos in the front row seats applauding the riveting performance. 
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